Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. This timeless piece of wisdom from author Oscar Wilde is a beacon for anyone embarking on the journey of self-reflection and storytelling. It’s a call to embrace your unique story and share it with the world.
Imagine transforming your life’s moments, both big and small, into a captivating essay or book that resonates with friends, family, and future generations. This is where the concept of a Lifeline comes into play. It’s a simple, yet profound tool to help you organize and reflect on the events that have shaped you.
The Lifeline Project: Your First Step
Creating a Lifeline is akin to sketching the outline of a grand painting, where each stroke represents a pivotal moment in your life. You don’t need elaborate tools to begin—just grab some posterboard, copy paper, or even a whiteboard, and you’re set. Consider using sticky notes and a blank wall for a dynamic and flexible approach. This exercise isn’t just for aspiring authors; it’s for anyone eager to delve into their personal or family history with a fresh perspective.
**Getting Started**
Reserve about an hour and start by brainstorming a list of 10 life events. This initial step will open the floodgates to your memory, allowing more moments to surface naturally. You’ll be amazed at how much you can remember during this exercise!
Turning Points and Special Events
Every life is a tapestry of moments that, together, form a unique narrative. Highlighting the turning points and special events in your Lifeline not only outlines your story but also helps you understand the impact of these moments. Consider:
– Physical locations that hold significance
– Historical events that intersect with your personal journey
Add bullet points or brief notes about stories that come to mind during this process. Include every sensory detail you can remember. These initial snippets can later blossom into full chapters or essays. Or maybe even a poem if you’re so inclined.
Unleashing Creativity and Capturing Memories
Placing your Lifeline where you can see it daily encourages ongoing reflection and creativity. Let your mind wander through your past before bedtime, and keep a journal nearby to jot down any memories or ideas that emerge. In fact, keep something to take notes with on you at all times during this process. Memories pop up at the strangest times and you don’t want to forget. This practice can unearth forgotten treasures and inspire new insights, potentially becoming key components of your story.
The Act of Starting
Louis L’Amour once said,
Start writing – no matter what – the water does not flow until the faucet is turned on.
Your Lifeline is that faucet.
Whether you prefer jotting down notes, using a voice recording app, or sharing memories with a friend, the key is to begin. This simple act of starting can unleash a flow of creativity and memories, paving the way for your storytelling journey. Give yourself a chance!
Sharing Your Story
Now that you’ve embarked on this journey of self-discovery and storytelling, consider sharing a piece of your Lifeline with others. Whether it’s through a personal essay, a blog post, or a conversation with a loved one, your story deserves to be heard. Remember, it’s not just about preserving memories; it’s about celebrating the unique path you’ve traveled and the wisdom gained along the way.
I’d love to hear about an event from your Lifeline or your goals for storytelling this year. Feel free to hit reply or share with a friend for that extra bit of motivation. Let’s turn those taps on and let our stories flow!
I met Jim Humphreys at a local writer’s group. He recently published his memoir My Friends Walk Barefoot and I’ve found it hard to put down. Yes, it’s that good. Amazon’s description reads: “Based on actual events, tells the story of Jim Humphreys, a veterinarian in Southeast New Mexico who for more than three decades treated everything from dogs to donkeys, cats (including a Bengal tiger) to cows, and canaries to ostriches.”
Jim shared the following story, an outtake from the book, during a critique session. I hope you get a kick out of it, we sure did! He was gracious enough to allow me to share it with you. Keep reading to the end, trust me, it’s worth it!
History Repeats Jim Humphreys
Something about that college history class I took back in 1972 just went bad. The irony of it was that I had always loved history. Especially military history. Everything from the Revolutionary War to the Civil War to the First and Second World Wars, Korea, and Viet Nam, fascinated me. I loved to analyze the backgrounds of famous generals, the strategies that won and lost battles. What I had never considered was that, on occasion, history has a strange way of catching up with you—as it did with me.
“Good morning, Mrs. Mitchell. Hey Amigo. How’s my buddy,” I yelled and crouched to give my favorite patient a bear hug as he enthusiastically licked my face. Amigo was Mrs. Mitchell’s twelve-year-old Labrador. Cataracts and stiff joints had not stopped him from dancing around like a puppy. Amigo was one of those special dogs who had no enemies—human, canine, feline, or otherwise. He loved everybody.
“We’re just here for shots today, Dr. Humphreys,” Mrs. Mitchell said. Maureen Mitchell was a widow in her mid-seventies. Her husband had not left her with much money, although one would never have guessed as much to look at her. Her hair always looked like she had just stepped out of the beauty salon and she took great pride in the clothes and jewelry she wore. Amigo was the second generation of Mrs. Mitchell’s pets that I had cared for. I knew her well. She was always happy and relaxed, but not today.
“Dr. Humphreys,” she said. “I’ve been diagnosed with macular degeneration. They tell me it is progressing rapidly. I have an appointment to see a retinal specialist in El Paso in two weeks. I’ll have to leave Amigo with you for a few days.” The words sounded painful to speak. “You will take good care of him for me, won’t you?”
“Of course, I will,” I said. “I’m so sorry ma’am. My mother had macular degeneration. I know it can be a challenge, Mrs. Mitchell, but you know what? The past few years have seen remarkable medical advances. I’m glad you’re going to see a specialist. Don’t you worry about Amigo. I’ll take good care of him.”
A comfortable smile spread across her face. “Thank you, Dr. Humphreys. I’ll be traveling two weeks from today. Some dear friends of mine from El Paso are going to pick me up. I’ll stay with them and they’ll bring me back.” She paused and then, “By the way, I would so much like for you to meet them. Kenneth was my husband’s roommate in college. I’ve known them for many years. They are very special friends.”
“I’ll consider it a privilege,” I said. “You let Roseann know what time you expect to be here. I’ll be waiting.”
I was finishing treatments that morning, two weeks later. “Dr. Humphreys,” Roseann said. “Mrs. Mitchell and her friends from El Paso are here to drop off Amigo.”
I walked into the waiting room and saw Mrs. Mitchell standing next to the couple. I approached and looked at him. He was tall and thin with grey hair. Perhaps in his early eighties, he had prominent cheekbones and held his chin high. He wore a sport coat and bowtie. I was ten feet from him when I stopped, stunned. Were my eyes playing tricks on me, I wondered. I knew this man. Or, did I? It had to be him. Then again, it had been twenty-five years since I had last seen the man whom I assumed I was looking at. Maybe I was mistaken.
It was difficult, but I was finally able to tear my eyes away from him to address my client. “Good morning, Mrs. Mitchell.” It took several hard bumps of his nose off my knee before I realized that Amigo was demanding a hug. I knelt down.
“Hi Amigo. How’s it going, buddy?”
“Dr. Humphreys,” Mrs. Mitchell said. “I’d like you to meet my dear friends. This is Mary.” I rose to my feet, smiled, and shook her hand. Before I could say a word, Mrs. Mitchell continued, “And this is Dr. Kenneth Bailey.”
Holy cow! It was him. It took me a second to reflect on that time. Twenty-five years earlier, the first semester of my freshman year at the University of Texas at El Paso, Dr. Kenneth Bailey had been my teacher for American History 101. It was a class I should have loved. Instead, I absolutely hated it. More importantly, it was the one and only class in all of my years of school—elementary, high school, college, and veterinary school—that I ever flunked. It was devastating. My parents were terribly upset. They were used to their youngest son getting mostly As, a few Bs, and a very occasional C in school. And then, I flunked history.
I remembered his voice. He spoke with a heavy southern drawl. Many of us in his class were convinced that he must surely be a direct descendant of Robert E. Lee himself. Yes, I thought. The voice would be final confirmation. I reached out my hand. “It’s a pleasure, Dr. Bailey.”
Dr. Bailey stood at attention, his back straight as an arrow, chin high as he reached for my hand. “The pleasure is entirely mine, Dr. Humphreys. Maureen has told Mary and me so much about you. We have awaited this occasion with great anticipation.”
Yup, it was him. In the years that followed that first semester of college, I had often asked myself, how I could possibly have flunked that course. Was the material that difficult? No. Granted, it was a Monday, Wednesday, Friday class at eight in the morning. It was a huge auditorium with cushioned seats. The podium on the stage from which Dr. Bailey lectured seemed so far away. The lights were dim and the ventilation system provided a gentle humming lullaby, an environment far too conducive to falling asleep. Was I lazy? Yes. What about Dr. Bailey? He spoke in a slow, unflappable monotone. Were his lectures the most boring I had ever had to endure? Absolutely!
I struggled with what to say next. Should I tell him? Yes, I should. Or—maybe not. In the end, I decided, yes. A voice in the back of my head screamed out, Are you nuts! You can’t tell him the truth! At least—not all of it. I took a deep breath. “Dr. Bailey, you may not believe this, and I’m quite certain you don’t remember me, but I was a student of yours many years ago, sir.”
Mrs. Mitchell turned her head sharply toward me. “Oh, my goodness,” she exclaimed. “Are you sure, Dr. Humphreys? This is incredible.”
Dr. Bailey was shocked as well. “My word. I must confess that I would not have known this fact had you not seen fit to bring it to my attention, sir.” He paused for a bit, looked at his wife, and smiled. “Mary, please remind me as soon as we get home—to check the files.” He turned toward me, his eyes full of confidence and determination.
“Dr. Humphreys, I have kept extensive records on all of my students’ achievements over the years. I simply must go back through my files and find the details of your experience in my classroom.”
Suddenly, I felt cold. Will you ever learn to keep your big mouth shut, I asked myself. “Oh,” I chuckled. “I wouldn’t bother, Dr. Bailey. There really isn’t much to tell.”
“Hogwash, sir. What year was it that I had the good fortune of having you as my student?”
I felt myself sinking—deeper and deeper.
“Uh, let me think. Hm, what would it have been? I guess, uh, maybe it was…gosh, what would it have been? Maybe 1972? Really, Dr. Bailey, I don’t think…”
“By God,” he interrupted. “This will be fun. I have always prided myself on being a better-than-average professor, but I am a much better researcher.”
With a subtle but quick motion of my hand across my face, I wiped the sweat from my upper lip that I had been desperately trying to conceal. I was temporarily speechless. It took me a moment to regain my composure. Then, I reassured Mrs. Mitchell that Amigo was going to be fine and bid her and the Baileys farewell.
I watched them walk to their car and reflected on how little time it had taken for me to dig myself into this hole. It wasn’t like I had robbed a bank. I had held other secrets from the world that might be considered reasons for reprimand, but this particular secret was embarrassing. I could live with Dr. Bailey knowing I flunked his course, but what would Mrs. Mitchell think of me? Now, that was important.
It was bad enough that I had flunked, but worse than that, a week before final exams, I had gone to his office to beg for mercy. I remembered the conversation as if it were yesterday. It had not gone well.
“What can I do for you, young man?” he had asked.
“Dr. Bailey, I’m flunking your class. I show up every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I’ve read the books—well, sort of–and I’m still flunking. I was wondering, sir, is there anything I can do for extra credit to raise my grade?”
He looked at me without smiling. “Extra credit? Are you serious? This is not a game show, young man. Why is it that I suspect you are one of those individuals who shows up on Monday morning bearing sunglasses in order to disguise the fact that you are napping during my lecture? Extra credit? No, sir! You will have to rely on the effort which you have put into my class, and perhaps someday, you will grow up.”
Oh well, I thought. There was no way in hell that Dr. Bailey was going to find any record of me or my failure in his massive files. And if by some miracle he did, then I would have to convince him and Mrs. Mitchell of the truth, that I was an immature young man who thought college was supposed to be all fun and that, eventually, I did grow up.
It was six weeks later that Mrs. Mitchell was due back in El Paso for her first follow-up eye exam. Roseann stepped into my office. “Mrs. Mitchell just called. She and the Baileys are on their way here to drop off Amigo. She wanted me to let you know that Dr. Bailey is most anxious to see you again.”
A few minutes later, I heard Mrs. Mitchell’s voice and the unmistakable clickity-clack of Amigo’s toenails trotting across the reception room floor. I had no way out. It was time to face the music. I stood, took a couple of deep breaths, released them slowly, and started a lingering walk from my office to the reception area. As I rounded the corner, I saw Dr. Bailey leaning over the counter that separated him from Roseann’s desk. I stopped and quietly backed up just far enough that he couldn’t see me. In a deliberate, bellowing voice, he announced to Roseann, “Young lady. You may not realize this, but Dr. Humphreys was one of my finest students.”
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Jim Humphreys graduated from the University of Texas at El Paso with a degree in microbiology. He received his Doctor of Veterinary Medicine degree from Texas A&M University in 1981. Jim was co-owner of College Garden Animal Hospital in Roswell, NM for thirty-three years treating both large and small animals. In 2014 he retired and moved to Las Cruces, NM.
If you’d like to connect with Jim, feel free to email him at: eldocjim@gmail.com. Now that you’ve read a bit of Jim’s story and seen how he was able to share it in such an interesting, humorous way, are you ready to share yours? Don’t wait, you can do this! Pick up your pen or laptop and just begin, right where you’re at. Best, Karen
As we leap into spring here in the U.S. I want to introduce you to my friend Victoria MacGregor from down under in Australia. She’s shared part of a Roman travel adventure with us in the guest post below. Wrong Way in Rome was first published in the Australian newspaper in 2018.
A little about her: Victoria says the Covid-19 lockdown of 2020 put a temporary damper on her travel plans. However, with a strong desire to do something tangible and memorable, she started to write.
Over the course of her working life, Victoria spent time in business administration management and was a small business owner for over 15 years. She’s no stranger to e-newsletter writing and blogging and has recently discovered a love for writing short stories. Her passion for sharing family history inspired her to write a children’s book and she has a novel and a memoir in the works. Victoria says, “I see lots of open doors! We’re never too old to start something new. Shake that grey matter loose and have a bit of fun doing it.”
Wrong Way in Rome – Victoria MacGregor
We plan our own travel. Mapping out the adventures is almost as much fun as the travel itself. We have a spreadsheet. A colossal, ridiculous database of dates, hotels, flights, trains, currency conversion, and budget. Nothing ever gets left to chance. Keeps us honest with time and money.
However, like most travel escapades, there’s got to be something unforeseen and overlooked that creeps into the experience and smacks us around the head.
As it happened to us, two and a half months into a four-month, 14 country, European post-retirement mega journey in 2014.
By the time we arrived at Stazione Tibertina in Rome from Venice, we’d stepped into nine countries. Starting in Turkey, weaving our way through Greece, Croatia, France, The Netherlands, Germany, the Czech Republic, Poland, Austria, and then Italy.
The mercury soared that September, but we managed to take in every inch of this magnificent city on foot in only three days. Ancient masterpieces interwoven with modern chic. It’s Roman magic.
Next stop, picturesque Positano. We reviewed the spreadsheet before bed, train tickets to Solerno at the ready, metro times confirmed, alarm set, ready.
Train departure at approximately 9:15 AM. We arrived confidently with almost an hour to spare. Perfect, time for coffee. We were getting good at this. Problem, our train, #1911, wasn’t listed on the departure board. As the minutes ticked by, other trains scheduled to depart after #1911, were getting displayed. #1911 wasn’t.
The queue at the service desk was growing with other confused travelers hoping for answers. Showing the attendant our tickets, anticipating an apologetic explanation, we received quite an unexpected response. “Sorry, you are at Stazione Tibertina. Your train is at Stazione Termini.”
Two stations? Our dumbfounded looks of complete and utter embarrassment prompted the attendant to continue, “If you hurry, you can get on the metro, Stazione Termini is the next stop. You have 10 minutes.”
We ran, bags thumping behind us, down the stairs, into the train, doors shut. Made it. Well, not quite.
In our panic, we’d leaped into a metro going in the opposite direction. Away from Stazione Termini. Frustration was evident by the steam emanating from our ears.
We got off, switched metro and sprinted to Stazione Termini. Train #1911 had left without us, on time. Our final option, purchase another ticket, departing in an hour… from… you guessed it…Stazione Tibertina. Tears, oh yes, there were tears.
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I trust you enjoyed Victoria’s story as much as I did. Following are a few ways to connect with her. She does fantastic work with family photos using Ponga as well.: http://www.victoriaspress.com contactvictoriaspress@gmail.com On Instagram @victoriaspress And her delightful children’s book Grace and Tommy’s Frosted Adventure! Click the title to find it on Amazon. I’ve already got my copy! Stay tuned for Victoria’s memoir, when it’s published I’ll let you know.
In the meantime, I bet one of your own travel adventures came to mind as you read Victoria’s story, write about it for your memoir! If you need help deciding how best to tell your story or need editing or an editorial assessment, I’m available to help. Reach out and let’s chat about your project. All the best, Karen
(Photo courtesy Gabriella Clare Marino via Unsplash)
School attendance is a high profile current topic and rightly so. We spend so much of our childhood in school, it has a profound effect on our likes, dislikes, character, love of learning, and friendships. These experiences provide a motherlode of material for memoir writers and family historians.
When I’m doing oral history interviews or memoir coaching, I find that school memories are always a rich source of content. We remember the GOOD, cherish, and laugh about it. We shudder at the BAD and often still carry the scars. We might count the UGLY among our most embarrassing memories, our funniest, or any number of other emotional boxes we shove our stories into.
Working on your family history or memoir? Think about experiences with teachers and schools, both GOOD and BAD. I had many great teachers, a few indifferent ones, some who were pretty average, and yes, some who were just bad. But, doesn’t this describe most of us at different times in our career and lives? We might never know the back stories of those whose lives intersect our own, including teachers and schoolmates. So, I have compassion, healthy boundaries, and have tried to learn from each of these educational realities.
You might have been shamed by a teacher frustrated that you didn’t “get” their favorite subject matter. Geometry anyone? How you handled this, or didn’t, and moved forward is an important part of your story. Maybe you were encouraged by another teacher who saw something positive and excellent in you? Perhaps it was wordsmithing skills in composition class, or your face lighting up (not literally- that might have been on the BAD list) over a chemistry experiment, an art assignment, building something useful in shop class or having a great understanding of history. Whatever it was, these experiences shaped you.
I’ve been an educator much of my life and love to see those “aha” moments when an idea becomes real and personal for someone. It happens in workshops, on zoom calls, even in feedback on social media posts. The lovely thing is, I’m always learning right along with you! Think back on your school experiences. There was GOOD, there was BAD, there was UGLY! Each of these is full of story, dig in and write about them.
Want to join others interested in writing their story? I’ve opened up a new private FaceBook group, Family History & Memoir Writers Fellowship, just for you! We’ll encourage each other in our storytelling journeys, have fun, share stories, crowdsource solutions, and prompt each other with inspiration and great ideas. We’re stronger and more creative together. Click the link above to check it out and I’ll see you on the inside! Karen
A friend posted this statement today in a memoir writing discussion thread: “Tomorrow is too late, live today” Then she asked, “Would you agree?” Wow! I can’t stop thinking about this, it’s such an interesting thought and question.
Carpe Diem! Seize the Day!
So many people become stuck in the mire of perfection. Someday, when “x” happens, if this is settled, then I’ll…. We’ve all talked this way. But then…decades go by and you’ve missed out on precious time and memories.
While of course it’s wise to plan and implement for today, tomorrow, and the future, there are opportunities and decisions that must be acted on in the moment. Over analyzing can keep us stuck. That said, it is never too late to take the next right step! As for me, I thrive on balanced living in all three time zones, past, present, and future (I do work with memoir, after all). This one life is a priceless gift and I don’t want to waste a minute of it. So today is simple, sweet, and designed to get you future authors and family historians un-stuck.
Here’s one big Seize the Day tip, it’s like a NEON YELLOW easy button, that can help you move forward with writing your memoir or family history:
#1: REPURPOSE things you’ve already created to get a jumpstart on your memoir content. Can you really do this? Sure thing – letters, recipes, journal entries, newspaper clippings, even descriptions of gifts you’ve made can form the foundation for a new chapter. You can include them as is, expound on the material, or use them as memory prompts. Create a themed collection if you like and make a simple photo book.
Photo book companies send out frequent discounts and can be an easy way to share the story of your keepsakes. Think beyond just photos, you can add story text, recipes, use your imagination. Try Shutterfly, Blurb, Mixbook, Snapfish, Picaboo to name just a few…search for the sales codes.
Now is the ideal time to begin thinking about a simple project to create as a gift for upcoming holidays, birthdays, anniversaries. Books like these gain instant heirloom status and are the secret sauce in memorable gift-giving.
By sharing the story behind family history keepsakes everyone benefits. No one gains if they stay shoved in a box. It is not the item that is of value but the memories behind it. Are you getting the most mileage from these materials you can? Do a little digging and help your family gain a rich understanding of their background and history. You’ll have fun in the process.
Bonus tip: Bet you thought of at least a couple items in your family history collection that you can do this with. Now, go and IMMEDIATELY APPLY these ideas to your treasures while the thought is fresh. Set a timer for 10 minutes and write out everything that comes to mind. Organize it later!
Need help? Feel free to contact me anytime and we’ll brainstorm some options. I’d love to hear from you!
This coaching is for family history or memoir writers who know they want to share their story but are overwhelmed or stuck with how to get it done. You have the stories and memories in your head, but struggle with getting them down on paper.
Ready to kick the overwhelm to the curb? I got you!
Three months, one goal to jumpstart your memoir, me by your side to help you every step of the way.
We will be looking at:
* What you want to accomplish with your story during these 3 months, as well as going forward.
* Where you’re stuck or limiting yourself.
* What are your goals for your story and what do you need to bring them to vibrant life?
* Weekly concrete steps to achieve forward movement toward your goals.
* What tactics and tools to use to make your story shine.
* Figuring out together the best storytelling strategy for you and your unique story.
* How to make everything we accomplish during our three months of 1:1 work last BEYOND and help you continue forward.
Basically, this coaching if for you if you’ve known you want to share your story (or that of a family member) but have become stuck with the size of the goal or the sheer quantity of material to work with. We handle all kinds of stuck, so let’s talk about it!
You will set your goal with my guidance and I’ll be beside you every step of the way over a period of three months to help you achieve it.
How it works:
* We’ll talk once a week on Zoom for an in-depth 1 hour session.
* You’ll have email access to me between sessions, including for critiques and questions.
* You’ll have phone access to me for a 15 minute check in between sessions should you need it.
* I will review whatever material you have and give a professional editorial evaluation, looking for strengths and weaknesses that we can address in relation to your goal. We’ll talk through any fixes or improvements that can help you tell your story in a way you can be proud of.
How to sign up:
Since 1:1 work is a big commitment for both of us, let’s make sure we’re on the same page and that there’s a good personality fit. If you’re interested in working with me, shoot me an email at karen@rememberingthetime.net and let me know what you’d like to achieve in a three month memoir coaching jumpstart. If I believe I can help you, we’ll set up a time to chat over the phone or Zoom call and I’ll send you a detailed overview of the Life Legacy Signature Coaching program.
I’m looking forward to visiting with you about your story!
Do your stories often start out, “When I was little…” or “When I traveled to X that summer…” or maybe “When we lived on the ranch…”? Master outdoor humor writer Patrick McManus wrote many books set during the WHEN of his growing up years with his best friend Crazy Eddie. If you haven’t sampled his stories try this one, The Grasshopper Trap.
Your WHEN, like the other memoir keys, will overlap with the other aspects of your story. However, this one serves as the large, solid master key in jump starting your memoir. You get to decide when to focus your story. Spend time reflecting on the times that have stayed fresh in your memory, what stands out? When does your mind like to travel back to? If you’re not sure, talk it over with friends or family and try to narrow down your story to an impactful time frame. Often when we talk our story out with others or ask them what stories they hear us tell the most, we will find our WHEN. You may be surprised at the feedback others give you about the stories and events they find most intriguing in your life. Remember, the decision is yours but don’t be afraid to explore a bit before you settle on your WHEN.
Memoirs can be narrowly focused on a short time period and be as short as a personal essay or book length. They can also cover an entire life…the choice is up to you. What stands out most to you as you think back over your life and times? Think about where the story lies, what grabs your heart, mind and soul?
Photos are great tool for narrowing down your WHEN. Go through your collection and set aside a few extra photos that illustrate this well for you. It’s good to have choices and your memories will be prompted by different images, see where they take you.
If you’re working on someone else’s story what memories tend to come up repeatedly when you’re talking with them? The answer to this question will help you focus your WHEN. Your chosen time might be dependent upon a memorable historical event or season. For example, the novel The Grapes of Wrath focuses on one family during the Great Depression. The Journals of Lewis and Clark cover one massive exploration event. The Diary of Anne Frank is constrained not only in its “when” but its location.
Look for the key moments and pay attention to what else was going on in the world at that time. This will often help shape the other sections of your memoir, especially the WHY. Explore the nature of your story’s WHEN, one story at a time. If you’re working with a grandparent or other elder, or perhaps even someone who’s no longer alive, this technique works well. Good questions to ask might be related to technological advancements like a lunar landing, world shaking events like wars and natural disasters, or the rise or fall of a world leader. Just as we’re sharing stories of our experiences during this worldwide pandemic, others did the same thing during the 1918 flu epidemic. These are universal human experiences full of story.
If your WHEN covers childhood, mine the events of that time for relevant material, they are some of our favorite recollections. There are countless television shows, movies, and books written about childhood memories. Remember the much-loved Wonder Years television series? Or The Waltons? These story lines did an amazing job of tying in larger societal events in the context of their impact on the characters. Memoirs work the same way. Your impressions and reactions to the events you witnessed at that specific point in time are unique to you but will resonate with others in the universal human language of emotion.
Perhaps your story will center around coming-of-age or a season of loving a favorite pet. The book Rascal, by Sterling North tells the delightful story of one young boy’s pet racoon. Fiction uses the same technique, think about the narrow time setting in To Kill a Mockingbird.
The stories we tell around the family dinner table or at holiday gatherings often start with the phrase “Remember when…?” Revisit these conversations in your mind and as you review your photographs, it will help you define the time setting of your story. Think both broad and narrow; your WHEN might involve personal or family life events that charted the course of your own days. Or historical events you witnessed may call you to share your perspective. You were there, you lived it, share your memories. Brainstorm what you felt, saw and heard. You get the idea, free write everything you can think of.
Remember your first love? That first car or job or when you first moved out on your own? Your wedding day or the birth of your children? Take your pick, there’s a wealth of memories lying behind the door your WHEN key will unlock. Involve your senses as you take notes and prep for working on this part of your story. What did the flowers look and smell like? How about the food that was served? Maybe the smell of fresh tilled fields always takes you back to that childhood summer on the farm. Do you remember the first time you went to the fair; the smell of corndogs and cotton candy mixed with the livestock barns? Unforgettable! Remember…the smell of a summer rainstorm, walking a favorite dog and hugging his soft side, the taste of Grandma’s fresh chocolate chip cookies, the smell of your great uncle’s pipe tobacco, the stories heard while spending time with a loved grandparent.
Pay attention to what stands out as you write down or record your memories, note the emotions and thoughts that rise up repeatedly. This is most often where your story lies – its the WHEN key under the mat, the sign post for your memoir. Give the future a gift of memories, personal and world history from your perspective.
Spend some time choosing your WHEN, you’ll be glad you did. This key will unlock doors and the stories will come tumbling out.
